Now it’s March 16, 2011 and I’m writing up a journal for a session ten days ago. Some things have changed since then. We’ve had yet another argument about the same thing (aftercare). Still wondering why it’s not offered more after sessions.
Session on March 06, 2011
This session, Master Joe informed me that the journal entry last time was too short. I had figured they were getting long and boring so had summarized them.
I started the session having earned -9 for lateness, both at first and when getting ready. He also said he’d think about the punishment for cumming when specifically told not to. I was instructed to get rope, towel, and again bottles of water, along with duct tape and the broom stick.
We did more bondage – I learnt how to make a hangman’s noose. I ended up hands tied to the bed, legs spread with the broomstick rather interestingly tied to my hands. It was intensely humiliating to be exposing myself like that since it left me with my ass pointed towards the cam and spread wide.
One thing that really worked was the mind game Master Joe played with getting me to drink water again. I was a bit scared of how far it would go and ended up using my safeword. I’d been told to drink over a liter of water again, and there was a towel laid on the bed…and I was bursting to pee. I asked several times to be let go and Master Joe refused. Finally, I couldn’t hold it any longer and had absolutely no wish to wet my bed, so had to use the safeword. It was a little disappointing since I try not to use it when I can.
Overall the session was very good. I enjoyed being tied up and the uncertainty of when I’d be released to pee. Being tied up was strange at the time – I usually don’t have much patience and at one time when I was talking to Master Joe, he didn’t have his earphones on so couldn’t hear me. Without the need to pee, I might have waited longer in that uncomfortably exposed position, but at that point I absolutely had to communicate (to beg to pee) and ended up twisting out of the bonds in order to type. I wonder how it would be to be tied up like that and not allowed to speak apart from the safeword…that would be interesting I think. Maybe we could try it sometime without the drinking water bit…might last longer.
Anyway, once I used the safeword to pee, the session was over and we had a talk afterwards that was much appreciated.
Session of March 08, 2011
The next session was similar in that it was also all about exposing myself and humiliation. But worse humiliation than before. This time I was on the floor, ass up towards the cam.
Anyway, so the session was mostly just me on the floor showing him my ass. I hate hate hate doing that. Absolutely hate it. But it also makes me wet…the humiliation and scrutiny. Go figure.
We started off with checking the bruises, sign, shaving, etc. It went fine.
He made me put on my corset, which I like to do sometimes. Waiting to hear what we’d be doing. We’d planned earlier to do the 2-3 hour bondage with the time-lock key but it was too late for that.
I would take this session as a sort of punishment. For while it got me wet – at one point I was dripping and because I had my head on the ground and ass up, the slow slow slooooow dropping of my juice from my cunt to the ground was VERY obvious – it was EXTREMELY embarrassing. The worst part was I could see it from my position on the ground…*cringes* I can still see it now. I think the most memorable part of the session for me was the embarrassment of watching my own juice slowly drip to the ground, and knowing Master Joe was watching. Normally when I find myself getting wet, I discretely wipe it off before Master Joe notices. This time I got no chance to do that but I’m still (naively) hoping he didn’t see it.
Anyway, not content with having me expose myself, Master Joe got the idea of having me spank myself with the wooden spoon. And told me that each stroke was to be hard or else start from the beginning. In a deliciously sadistic twist, he also added that I was to count aloud, and if I counted a soft whack as a hard one, I’d start all over again. Needless to say I was well over the original number of strokes by the time we were done. Several times, what I thought were hard strokes, he thought were mild so made me restart. After a while I actually liked this little game so intentionally miscounted a couple of times. I know it wasn’t a good submissive thing to do but the masochist took over somewhere in the middle J
Once the session was over, we had a long talk about various things. I enjoyed the chat this time round. Learning languages, thoughts on the future, that sort of thing. Master Joe wanted me to try learning German, but that’s impossible. I was literally dragged kicking and screaming through high school French (of which I remember nothing), and managed to claim it for college second language credit. So the last time I even attempted to learn a foreign language was about ten years ago. And it was a pretty unsuccessful attempt!
We also talked of taking risks. And how I’m happy enough taking risks (prancing about naked on a yahoo webcam for example is a risk) as long as they aren’t too big a risk. Small risks usually fulfill my occasional need for adrenaline – skydiving for instance, or any extreme sport, is excellent. Jumping off the fourth storey of a building to see if I break a leg would not be so excellent.
Oh and Master Joe also mentioned wanting gladiator style shows back lol! I’m glad he doesn’t get to make those decisions as I don’t think I would enjoy watching people trying to kill each other. Now if it was gladiatorial style consensual public BDSM sessions…hmm well J
Session of March 11, 2011
This session started off very well. We discussed possibility of inviting a viewer to watch one of the sessions. He’d mentioned it briefly before and though it’s exciting I also want a bunch of extra boundaries during that session. I asked for no penetration, less humiliation than pain, being able to see the guy before he sees me on cam. Master Joe agreed to these requests. Once I see the guy, I’d like to refuse if I see something odd about him. Finally, I’d also like to ask for a warning beforehand saying that in the next session we’d be having a visitor.
This time I’d got the needles and the stapler ready. I knew what the needles were for, but wasn’t so sure about the stapler. Master Joe asked me what I thought it was for – and I said I had no clue. He then suggested stapling my cunt lips together L I wasn’t sure whether or not to believe him. I’m still not sure I do yet…that seems a bit extreme for me. I can’t even pin them with the clothes pins yet so I doubt I’ll EVER be able to staple them. But then again I’d said that about needles before and guess what happened next…
Anyway, we tried the needles. This time it was far less scary than the last but still quite scary. Just the letting go part is very difficult. And watching it sticking in me afterwards. But once it’s done and I’ve removed them from my body, it feels good to have done them. Also knowing it’s being enjoyed helps. There was a little blood and I cleaned off afterwards. I was fussing over the smallest drop of blood… Anyway, it’s still much less scary now than before. Who’d have thought?
As for the stapler, we tried the tits and the navel. Before we fully started, yahoo acted up and I tried briefly by myself to see how it felt while we were setting up the connection again. When we reconnected, Master Joe asked me if I thought I could handle it and I told him I’d just tried already and I could. It seemed to piss him off a little. Told me that I was to follow what he said and nothing else.
By then I’m sure Master Joe knew that after that threat of the pussy, breasts and navel would seem easy as pie. And it wasn’t so bad. Not like the needles. It was hard to do the navel. Not mentally, just physically it was hard to grasp the skin and it only half worked there. We also tried the cunt…or rather the mound, not the pussy itself. That was more painful than the breasts. The breasts were hardly noticeable. They worked the best and it was easy to get the staple all the way in. I can just see this building up to a line of little staples somewhere. Hmm…but maybe I shouldn’t be giving anyone any ideas.
Towards the end, he offered to reduce 100 minus points if I stapled my cunt lips. And I refused. As it is, I’m not sure I like bargaining for points…and besides not even reducing ALL the minus points to 0, then giving me a 100 plus points would have made me staple my cunt lips. They’re sure to bleed and hurt like a bitch. I’m surprised Master Joe even asked me to do it so soon but I can say right now that it’s not happening. Not at all. At least not in the near future J
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